Adult sexting on the rise - safe sexting tips and advice for boomers

Tarik Kizilkaya/Istock Before sending a sexy text or photo on your mobile phone, be sure the recipient will keep it private. En español Sexting has become once again the undoing of former

Rep. Anthony Weiner. The New York Democrat resigned his seat and derailed his political career five years ago for committing the act, and he repeated the injudicious use of a cellphone on

July 31, 2015, by sending an unidentified woman a sexually suggestive image of his crotch, according to the _New York Post. _This time, it’s costing him his marriage. His wife, Huma Abedin,

a longtime Hillary Clinton aide, is reportedly filing for divorce. “After long and painful consideration and work on my marriage, I have made the decision to separate from my husband,”

Abedin said in a statement Monday. “Anthony and I remain devoted to doing what is best for our son, who is the light of our life. During this difficult time, I ask for respect for our

privacy.” Sexting is a practice often associated with teenagers. But the reality is that more and more of the 50-plus set, both single and married, routinely use text messaging to send

tantalizing pictures and provocative words to their partner, according to relationship experts. SEXTING 101 FAN THE FLAME. New to sexting? "Sexpert" Genie James recommends texting

a quick love note to your sweetie during the day. Some of her favorites are, "Love you most," or "I still want to go to the prom with you!" TURN UP THE HEAT. When

you're comfortable, try texting something slightly suggestive, James says. "Can't wait until tonight" would work even for shy novices. Feeling bold? She recommends

turning things up a notch with something along the lines of, "Forget chocolate, I am craving the taste of you!" STAY GROUNDED. If you're dating, keep expectations based on

sexting in check, says psychotherapist and advice columnist Dr. Jonathan Alpert. Just because you're getting hot and heavy texts, that doesn't necessarily mean you'll get hot

and heavy in person. SEND, DELETE. If you're sending or receiving racy notes or photos, delete them after they're sent, advises relationship coach Suzanne Blake. "If you lose

your cell phone or it's stolen, pictures can be uploaded in a heartbeat." –And that's not to mention the possibility of your teenage kids innocently flipping through your

texts or photos. Most of them are not sexting in the highly public — and, as he acknowledged, "inappropriate" — way that Weiner has admitted to doing. Rather, they are using it as

a fun, easy and usually harmless way to spice up their sex. Relationship coach Suzanne Blake has seen and heard it all when it comes to sexting, including a wife who enjoys sexting her

husband while he's traveling on business, telling (and showing) him what he's missing at home. While this may surprise some, Blake's not surprised at all. "It's a

misnomer that the biological changes of aging have to lead to a decrease in sexuality and sexual experience," she says. Whether they're single and casually dating, married, or in

long-term relationships, "Boomers want sexual activity," Blake explains. "They want to flirt. It makes them feel lively and young." Jill, 50, certainly feels fresh and

vital when she sexts."It makes you a little more brave," she says. "It takes the fear away, your inhibitions. I might be a little more bold in a text message than I would be

over the phone or in person." Sexting also makes the South Carolina nurse, who's been divorced for 15 years and enjoys casual dating, feel as if she had a "naughty

secret." "If you're sitting in a restaurant waiting for your food, you can just talk dirty to someone, and no one knows what you're doing," Jill says, in a slow

Southern drawl. "I would rather talk on the phone. But I'm also comfortable with hiding behind texting if I want to say something dirty." "That's exactly the appeal

of sexting," according to New York psychotherapist and advice columnist Dr. Jonathan Alpert. "Because there's no anticipation of a direct verbal response, there's less at

stake than if the conversation were being held the old-fashioned method: face-to-face," he says. "Where there's less risk of being critiqued or judged, there's

opportunity for greater sexual expression." "It also fits nicely into longtime couples' busy schedules to keep things spicy," says relationship and sexual health expert

Genie James, who recommends sexting to couples who travel a lot, live apart in different cities or have trouble connecting throughout the day."It’s cheap," she says."It's

quick. It's right there. And nobody can hear you." James continues, "It's about setting the stage for sex and keeping passion alive. A cellphone's in your hands

every day. You're already doing it." But beware, the experts warn. Sexting has its dangers, too. For one thing, it can be easy to send a text to a wrong number, and that can be

embarrassing — or worse. When it comes to dating, false advertising is often a big issue, says relationship expert Dr. Gilda Carle. It's something online daters may be all too familiar

with when their date shows up looking about 30 years older than his profile photo. "They're overselling and over-promising," she says of big-talking sexters. "I think too

much, too soon in relationships is not such a great thing. I suggest to people that you grow the relationship outside the bedroom so that when you come into the bedroom, it's your

playpen."  Then there's the comfort factor. Not everyone likes having a sexually charged text or photo pop up on her phone as much as she thought she would. Richard, 66, received

an X-rated photo on his cellphone from a potential online date recently and surprised himself by being less than thrilled. "It was a little bit embarrassing," the Iowa resident

says sheepishly. "Well, it was very embarrassing." The fact that he was with a group of colleagues after hours at a restaurant didn't help matters, either. Sexting might be an

interesting experiment, he says with a sigh, but after his experience, "It was like the fun kind of went out of it."