Why you should choose a personal word for 2023

As a new year begins, people often pledge to break bad habits or get a fresh start. But these days, more people are swapping the obligatory New Year’s resolutions — which often come with a

lot of stress and disappointment — for a personal word of the year. Picking a word of the year can bring clarity and focus to who we want to become and what we want to accomplish in life. A

carefully chosen word is a type of mental mentor — something to help us stay motivated as we move toward our goals in 2023. “Resolutions feel like rules after a certain point,” says Janice

Simon, a leadership and career coach in Houston, Texas, who has been guided by a personal word of the year, like 2021’s “celebrate,” for several years now. “I like [using a] word [instead]

because it’s not limiting. It sets an intention so that every action I take for an entire year has some meaning behind it.” Janice Simon uses a personal word to guide her through the year.

Courtesy Kimberly Stauffer HOW TO CHOOSE YOUR PERSONAL WORD OF THE YEAR * Think about who you want to become, then write down words that describe that person. Cull from there. * Make sure

the word is something you want to do, rather than something you think you should do. We have a better chance of following through on words that speak to our spirits. * Resist the urge to run

the word by someone before you choose it, to avoid being influenced by an outside opinion. * Ask yourself whether you can commit to the word. If not, go back to your list. If so, congrats

on moving closer to what you want out of life. If resolutions are rigid rules to accomplish a goal, choosing a word of the year can be a guide for decisions and a gentle reminder to stay the

course. But that doesn’t necessarily mean progress with a word of the year is easier or simpler than sticking to a resolution. “So many things pull us in other directions, and most of the

time our best intention is not the easiest path,” says Seth J. Gillihan, a clinical psychologist in Ardmore, Pennsylvania. “And without consistent focus, and reminders, and diligence, we

tend to drift onto the path of least resistance. We don’t usually fall into being our best selves.” That said, a signature word may be more palatable to work with. Think of it this way:

While resolutions often seem to have a judgmental quality to them, a personal word of the year often is about a value. (Think honesty, openness, patience.) “A value is something we can

always be moving toward; there’s no end point for a value like there is with a goal,” notes Gillihan, author of _The CBT Deck: 101 Practices to Improve Thoughts, Be in the Moment & Take

Action in Your Life_. His past words of the year include “steadfast” and “joy.” “It’s more of a direction than a destination,” he says.  MOVING AWAY FROM NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS A few years

ago, Simon, 54, swapped her usual resolutions — exercise more, eat out less — for a word of the year after hearing about it on social media. So how did she fare with her 2021 word of

“celebrate,” especially during a pandemic year? As an immuno-compromised, introvert who worked from home and lived alone, “I felt like anytime I poked my head out was a celebration,” she

says.