19 conversation starters for common social situation

​It’s the season for gatherings: lots of food, maybe a road trip, seeing friends and relatives — and perhaps some anxiety over how you’ll engage in conversation.​ ​Making small talk and

guiding the conversation takes some skill and thought. If you’re at a party with friends or family, don’t expect the conversation to always be effortless. Awkward moments are inevitable when

trying to break the ice with those you’ve just met, friends and relatives you haven’t seen in a while or even sometimes with people you know. ​ ​Planning can ease the tension. Draft some

open-ended questions that can work with family members of any age, such as “How are you spending your summer?” or “What’s been keeping you busy?”​ Some subjects are more likely to bring

conflict. “You should always stay away from politics, religion and money,” says Diane Gottsman, owner of the Protocol School of Texas and a leading etiquette expert. (“But those are the most

popular topics,” she adds with a laugh, because they’re what “many people enjoy discussing and debating.”)​ ​Also skip negative family or social circle gossip. It’s impolite. ​ Getty

Images ​Whether you’re going to a family barbecue, a reunion that lasts the weekend or a friend’s party, here are several conversation starters to set you at ease and to get the most out of

your interactions.​​ FIND COMMON GROUND​ ​If you’re at a family gathering, ask people where they fit in the family tree, or about the neighborhood they live in, or their favorite

hobbies.​​ “Most people love to talk about themselves,” says novelist Marie Bostwick, 60, a former event planner. She adds that you may discover common ground as you listen, which then can

kick off another set of questions. Some sample openers:​ ​1. WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DO YOU LIKE TO LISTEN TO?​ 2. WHERE WAS THE LAST PLACE YOU WENT ON VACATION?​ 3. WHAT MOTIVATES YOU?​​

​SHARE MEMORIES​​ Every family or longtime friendship has favorite stories that go way back. If you’re meeting someone new, you may have fun tales of people you know in common. Throw out a

“Remember when…” and see how many people chime in; they can help fill in details you didn’t know or may have forgotten. For older adults, a good place to start reminiscing may be to say,

“Tell me about a time…”​ ​4. WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER ABOUT THE PLACE WHERE YOU GREW UP?​ 5. DO YOU HAVE A FAVORITE MEMORY OF THE TWO OF US?​ 6. WHAT WERE YOU LIKE AT MY AGE?​